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After a break up: Finding good divorce advice

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Divorce advice for couples

If you jump on Facebook or mention a break up at your local coffee shop, plenty of people will offer divorce advice – wise or otherwise. The difficult thing is knowing who is worth listening to! So, what do you do when good divorce advice is hard to find?


A breakup or divorce comes with lots of challenges, like figuring out how to celebrate holidays (and big family events) after a separation,  or clashing over what’s up for grabs in property splits in separations.  But with the right breakup advice, you can make the tough divorce process that little bit easier.

Here’s how to find good divorce advice (and survive a breakup):

  1. Identify a trusted tribe of friends and family. When you’re going through a breakup, sometimes the world seems to be crashing around you. You need your people by your side, in your corner, supporting you without fail. Remind yourself of people you know have your best interests at heart, such as your mum, a best friend, a sister. Remember, you’ll need to be sure your secrets are safe with, so choose people who won’t betray your trust.
  2. Ask the right professional for the right breakup advice. Do you need to know what the plumber says about separation? Probably not. What the coffee shop guy says about who he serves after separation? Probably. But a doctor, psychologist, financial adviser and lawyer? Definitely.
  3. Practice self-care. Life can be overwhelming even without managing a breakup, separation or divorce. Your life will look different after breaking up but in life, change is natural and can be navigated with the right tools and mindset. Make sure you’re giving yourself time to reconnect or recalibrate, whether that means getting outside in the sun, exercising, a luxurious bath or any other simple pleasure that feeds your soul.

What to consider when seeking professional divorce advice

When it comes to a break up, do your due diligence. Just as you would ask your tribe for advice when your newborn won’t sleep, ask for recommendations for lawyers or psychologists. Then, do further research. Check out their credentials. Whether it is a lawyer, a psychologist or a financial adviser, find out what their training is, their expertise and their experience. Look for a lawyer with training, expertise and experience in family law. Remember, just because a lawyer practices family law does not mean they much experience in family law, or any special training. If they are not working in a family law firm, try and find out what their practice does. Does the lawyer you’re speaking with practice in a range of areas or are they the Family Lawyer of the General Practice? What is their experience in family law? Their expertise?

Deciding what breakup advice matters most to you:

Learn to ask the right questions. If experience with difficult ex-husbands matters to you, you might ask:

  • What is your experience with AVOs?
  • With husbands who control all the finances?
  • With family trusts, family businesses, child support and private school fees?

Decide what matters to you and learn to ask the right question. And don’t be afraid to go somewhere else if the lawyer does not have the experience you need. In a break-up, your most deeply cherished people and your most prized possessions may be at stake. Make sure it is done right and you have the right people in your corner.

A place for good advice: Doolan Wagner Family Lawyers

Doolan Wagner Family Lawyers only do Family Law. The practice is focused on being the best family law firm serving the North Shore and beyond.

  • Lisa Wagner, an Accredited Family Law Specialist, is at the helm.  She also trained and practices as a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner and Collaborative Family Lawyer.
  • Prue Hawkes, Associate, has a Masters in Family Law with a thesis in Complex Parenting Matters.
  • Senior Lawyer Lucy Warhurst is completing her Masters in Family Law, and Family Lawyers.
  • Ashleigh Middlin and Catherine Piotrowski are trained Collaborative Lawyers.
  • Stephanie Ordanoska is the resident ‘case watch’ expert, reading and writing articles month after month to keep herself and our clients up to date with the latest developments in family law.

Doolan Wagner Family Lawyers have the training, expertise and experience to offer advice following a break up. They don’t handle wills and estates, commercial law or criminal law – just strive to be the best lawyer to provide you with the advice you need after a break up. Find out more about Doolan Wagner Family Lawyers.

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